My good friends know, they mean the world to me. Even in those times we don't get along, or have a fight. Some of them I've known for a long time and others have just become important to me.
I've always been a person that believes in "Because it feels right." and intuition. That little voice inside my head, that is saying "I really like this person and how he/she makes me feel." and bugs me until I do something about it. All the people in my inner circle have been that way and I hope at least some of them feel the same about me.
All the situations have been different and the ways I got to know the people differ a lot. But, all that is important, is that I love all of them from the bottom of my heart. Even if I move far away, I'll be there for them as much as I can.
From time to time, I have not listened to my intuition at all and ended up in bad situations with people. I have had my heart broken many times, even by just friends. In life you learn the hard way, always...
Here's some of my "family" and how I met them. Who should I start with...
Pii and Eltzu.
Some quite new people in my life, known them just a bit over a year.
Eltzu is a really sweet girl, with more problems than anyone I know. She is disabled and has a really bad OCD caused by trauma. I try to help her as much I can, even went to a hospital to visit her. I hate hospitals... We have done some crazy shit together and that's why I really enjoy her company. We can talk about anything and everything. No random idea is off-limit.
I met her through Meet-ups I go to almost every week. We studied in the same college and We had the same experiences there. A really shitty school... She has since been really dear to me.
Same time I met Eltzu, I also got to know Pii. When I met her, she was a Trans woman just starting her transition process. Somehow I just didn't see her gender really... I just saw Pii, not the Gender or what ever, maybe it's cause I used to thing, I should have been born as a guy... I liked her from the moment we met. She is the one I can have really deep intelligent conversations with and be goofy with, in one day. We love to shock people and do absurd things, watch absurd movies and talk about anything and everything, anywhere. Nowadays she has finally reached "puberty" and her boobs have crown a lot (had to say that ;)) It's kinda fun to talk about bras and girl things with someone who was born into a male body.
Ellu...
I met some years ago, I believe it's around ten years. Looking at the old pics of us together, I remember very little of that time. I have kinda chosen to forget everything before 20... But I do remember how I felt about her. I had a HUGE crush on her from the very first moment we met.
We both were in Espoo parish and we both were really into it... We used to hang out in the parishes youngsters cafe, Lujakallio and we both were confirmation camp workers and really into it... Looking back to those times, the old me would so not approve of my choices now. I was a good little Christian girl and could never think I would be like this.
Ellu is and always has been one of the most beautiful girls I know, inside and out. Unfortunately as I have said before I am a very difficult person to be with and I have a bad temper... Cause of Ellu's lack of a filter in what she says, I got offended by some of the things she said.One of the things is that, We both had a crush on the same guy and well... He chose Ellu over me. I still think it was a bad choice on Ellus part, to date that guy, not just cause he ended up being a huge asshole, but cause he managed to destroy many other relationships in the process... He managed to get me in so many bad situations...
Well anyway, I didn't really keep in touch with Ellu for a long time, cause of two reasons, I had a phase in my life that was me breaking away from almost everything to do with religion and the old me, and cause she managed to piss me off so bad.
But, We fixed things and now for the past couple of years she has been one of the most important people in my life. Love her so much and she has been there for me in my worst times.
Helen...
She is the only person I have known for the whole time I've lived in Espoo. We met the first time when I was 10 and she was in my little brothers class in school. That is 14 years... Longest time I've actually known anyone, besides my relatives. We weren't friends right away, but years later, she had been drinking with my brother and ended sleeping at our place. Ever since that, we have been friends. I lived one summer at her place, as did the whole crew we had back then. We've had times when, we really don't see each other much, but still every time we do it's the best times. We had a huge fight, cause of some drunken shit I said or did or what ever, a year ago. It was the worst being mad at her, it felt like a part of me was missing.
She has always been like a baby sister to me and I love her. She had an anniversary with her boyfriend today, 4 years... Holy shit that sounds like a long time, but well I think they are kinda perfect for each other. He has also become somewhat important to me. The 3 of us try to see each other every week since we live so near.
She really is more like me than any other. We like the same movies, same tv-shows and so many other things. I could say that she is one of the reasons to stay in Espoo, but as she herself said, I do what ever feels right.
These are few of my family. There are others I have not written about... Yet...
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